The Ice Palace

We are so vain that we even care for the opinion of those we don't care for...

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Cha Cha Cha Changes...


I give up. I had hoped that "some day" BB(British Boy) and I could maybe start over and see where that goes. Last night I was feeling really good about things. He invited me to play EQII with him, and he told me he missed chatting and hanging out with me. Everything was great. We were talking about how we missed each other's company, and that neither of us had any expectations... and then BLAM... out of no where I say something that changes the course of history forever.

When I spoke those fateful words, I had no idea I was making him hate me. Making his blood run cold. You see when we originally broke up, I sent out an email to my friends who happened to be DJ's (on MPYR Radio) letting them know I was ok, what had happened and the station was fine, BB wasn't going anywhere. I wasn't going anywhere, etc etc... It was done so that no one would panic and take sides. I didn't send it to all of the DJ's as I wrote it as a personal letter, with station info in it. The three DJ's that were left off that mailing were BB, His Family, and best gal pal. I figured if he wanted to tell them we had split up, it was his place. I felt like I would have been overstepping my bounds had I sent that to them as well as it was truly not a station update. I mentioned this in passing last night as we spoke on the phone. He grew very silent and then said he had to go to bed. I knew something was wrong so I asked him. He then spoke words I never wanted to hear.

"I resign from the station, effective immediately."

I felt chills, and my stomach did big flip flops. My heart sank, and I tried to explain it wasn't a "station E-mail", to no avail. He wouldn't listen to me, he kept saying that he wanted no part of a station where people don't come to his shows because he broke up with me. I tried to explain that wasn't the case as far as I knew. He told me to take care and hung up.

I couldn't sleep last night. I kept thinking how when I got out of bed this morning, it was all going to somehow be better... but it wasn't. He posted his resignation on the forums, and e-mailed me that he has no desire to be part of this anymore.

What hurts the most, is right when I got my best friend back, he doesn't even want to speak to me anymore. He has deleted everyone and everything to do with MPYR Radio, or me. He won't speak to me, he won't answer my last e-mails, he's done with me. Like I never existed.

I hate this station. I hate that I ever started it. I hate that I hate it... but I do. I hate that I hurt my best friend... but I did. Now here I am again... Brokenhearted Part 2

The only good that has come out of this is that I found out who my true friends are.


At 1:26 PM , Blogger Mark said...

Oh Debi....I am so sorry it came down to all this... I don't know anyone who avoided his shows intentionally based on your email to us, your friends. Surprisingly, when you responded to us, you never said a negative thing about Steve. So often following a break-up those involved have nothing good to say about the other. You did not take that road. Instead you stayed positive about the station and reassured us of him staying, and the station continuing with business as usual.... It's not right. His response was to throw the baby out with the bathwater...

I wish he wouldn't leave....and (i am assuming a couple of others as well). But at this point it is what it is...and as your friend i will stick by you, though I wish him and the others well.

At 11:24 PM , Blogger Luka said...

It just blows. *hugs I think you rock!

At 6:55 PM , Blogger Mark said...

The more I think of this the more pissed I after this I'm gonna try not to think about it...
If he was pissed because he thought "people" weren't going to come because of the email you sent....then how come I didn't see or hear of anyone of us staying away? Monty was there , I made it when I could, several of the others popped in from time to time....and all this after the email you sent... Of the 3 "Nephalites", the only one to show a bit of class was Halo...she was the only one who gave notice....and did her show before leaving....I can understand why she felt she had to leave...and I can understand why Els left....but at least he could have resigned more gracefully....

At 2:48 PM , Blogger Pandora said...

That is the weirdest word verification ever. I like my EE better. They are actual words. XD Who ever heard of Enodhlit?! Sounds like someone's hard-to-pronounce last name. EEESH! Anyway. (;

Don't worry about him. I have no idea why he thought people would not come to his shows. I mean, really. If we were going to be like that, it's just one more step to being - vocal - about our dislike. And, seriously, we are people with big mouths. If we were going to do that - I don't think it'd be a subtle boycott. (; Maybe that's just me. (;

Anyhoo! I <3 you. (= If that's how he wants to be, then - really. Do you need him? O_o

(PS - I must have misread it, because it gave me a new one, which isn't anything close to being a word! (; )


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