Friends Don't Let Friends Drunk Dial

Star Date: The day after Harry's got Grey Goose Vodka...'nuff said.

When the waitress said "You know we have Grey Goose now!"
I think Jen said something like "OH NO!" and rightly so.
I didn't even plan on going out last night, and wearing my daughter's sparkly shoes, and um her sweater too...but when the packing material sales guyz came into the office yesterday we somehow started talking about how I go out and sing karaoke on Thursday nights. It's a natural transition in MY world OK? It just so happened that they were staying in the very same city I go sing in, and just happened to know how to get to the bar. (Convienent huh?) I invited them to join Jen B. and I if they wanted, and they said they might. I had no idea they would actually show up.

"Junior"(because he is the owner(of the packing material company)'s son) was a real hottie. Alan(cause um that's his name) wasn't hot, but he was funny so that makes up for it, actually did show up. Now before all two of my loyal readers freak out and ask "what about CG?" just wait bitches!...Junior is Married with three kids. He was just there to hang out, worship at the temple of Debi(cause I am a Diva and all) and buy us drinks. Which he did, a LOT! It just seemed like such a waste to not accept free Vodka...I love me some taters, and Vodka is made of taters...so again...it's a natural progression for me, just go with it. Some girl named Frenchie (That was her first mistake) sang MY SONG (That was her second) although, if Diva reads this she will of course say it was HER song to begin with, but here in Cali-for-ni-a *I* own it...so yeah. This lead me to glare at French Fry the rest of the night. The sales boyz were trying to tempt me with promises of free note pads and box cutters to sing the same song directly after she did. This was indeed a fabulous offer, but I took the high ground and sang something better. It's hard to believe I have something better, I know. We had a lot of fun with the salez guys but they had to get up early to distribute calendars, and box cutters to other moving diva's, so their night was cut short.

"Mohawk" and "Veigny" showed up, and Jen B had the fabulous idea of doing some Kamikaze karaoke. Now for those of you in blogland that don't know what this is I shall explain. Everyone who plays, puts their name in the hat to be drawn out, when you draw that person's name, you end up picking their song for them, and they are forced to sing it. I drew Veigny's name, and ended up making him sing "Beautiful" By christina Aguilera. Mohawk had to sing "The rose", which I think he knew way too well. I had to sing "Smooth Criminal"...that was bad. I think the best was when Jen B. had to sing "Ice Ice Baby". I think she should have dedicated it to me! While she was singing her tribute to me, a gentleman(I use this term loosely) sat down next to me and introduced himself. It was very hard for me not to laugh at him, as I had not 15 minutes earlier been doing my best impression of a deaf mute in order to not speak to him, as he was flailing his arms in order to get my attention. (THIS by the way is NOT a good way to get me to talk to you) He rambled on something about me being pretty, and a great singer....He must have heard my version of smooth criminal...I just smiled and thanked him, still trying not to laugh. When Jen B. got back to the table she said "Beat it!" to him. He just stared at her in disbelief. I just kind of laughed, and pretended to be shocked at her behavior. He ended up unable to hold a conversation with me, and shuffled away to his friend. The night ended with Mohawk & Veigny bribing us to go to their karaoke show this weekend. Hmm....perhaps.

On the way home...and this is where it always goes bad...I called CG. Last I talked to CG, he was crashing some party in Vegas where they were providing him with lots of free beverages. I believe he said he may get drunk..I dunno I was looking at myself in the mirror and was distracted. He didn't call me all night, and of course that can only mean trouble Lassie! What? Timmy's in the well? So the best thing for me to do is slobber all over my phone and call him. I'm not REALLY sure what I said to his voice mail, but I remember calling him a bitch. I'm sure I said it with love...but why on earth would I call him a bitch? When did it become ok to call CG, of all people, bitch?! It's the groundhog's fault I tell ya! I know you are reading this, and you are stunned...or if you know me, you are just shaking your head thinking...wow...again? If you are Diva you are saying "I still love you". I must have figured out that I called him bitch, because as I was climbing the stairs to go to bed, I dialed again. OK someone take away my cell phone PLEASE! Again I got his voice mail. (Why isn't he answering? Is it because I called him a bitch? Did I even really do that? I should call Jen B and ask her.) This time I apologized for calling him a bitch....and said something about his ass...but I dunno what. I know I know...bad bad bad. He comes home from Vegas tonight. Unless of course he got so drunk, that he was mugged, and left for dead in the desert. (Does this mean I don't get my present?) Thank God he will be too tired from his drive home to do much, cause I will probably just pass out on my stairs when I get home.

Good Times!