Cats In Bud Vases...

So I was telling Monty how sometimes I'm not sure men are worth the trouble, and maybe I should just buy my own house so I can have a cat, and eat lots of doughnuts (and probably the Cheetos I have grown to love so much). She is most excellent and replied with this...

We can buy a house together and have lots of cats and be the
neighborhood Crazy Cat Ladies, and whenever one of our hundreds of
cats dies we can cremate them ourselves on the backyard barbecue and
keep their ashes in little crystal bud vases all over the house.
And we can eat all the donuts we want and get very fat, because you
know I'd love you even if you weighed six hundred pounds. But I
wouldn't be able to help you out of your rocker, though. :)
Probably because I would also weigh six hundred pounds and I wouldn't
be able to get up myself. This sounds like a do-able plan.

Now the good news is, I am grooming my son to take care of me when I am older and fatter. I have already taught him how to pour wine, make spaghetti, and cakes, and shop with coupons. I really don't think he would mind helping Monty out of her rocker too. I think I'll ask him tonight when I get home and see what he says.