The Ice Palace Gets A Make Over!
The Ice Palace has had a make over!
Thanks so much Lisa, it's exactly what I wanted!
We are so vain that we even care for the opinion of those we don't care for...
Last night I decided it would be a swell idea to go to our local fair. I called up my friend Ryan. The one that got fired from The Grid for talking to some girl on the phone. (he would like me to point out he did a LOT more than that to get fired) I told him what fun we would have and he decided to go. He met me at my house and I drove to the fair. On the way to the fair we played with my new satellite radio in my car. It went from 80's music to reggae, to dance rave type music, to showtunes. When we got to the showtunes we started talking about what shows we had seen lately, and he mentioned that he had seen Phantom, and it was awesome. That's great. I am truly happy for you Ryan, but WHY OH WHY did you feel the need to tell me all about your glitter fantasy? Ryan apparently only has one fantasy involving a woman dressed as a fairy wearing so much glitter that he will find it in his bed for the next three weeks. Oh and he SWEARS he's not gay...Yeah ok whatever! While on our way to the fair we almost rear-ended a Volvo driving old hag that apparently had to look at the car pulled over on the side of the road. Ryan was screaming "I'm in my happy place. I'm in my happy place" I am guessing that place involved glittered fairies. The fair provides shuttle service to the fair if you park miles away. That bus ride to the fair is always a prelude to the freakshow we are about to endure. There was one couple who apparently didn't get the "how to dress for the fair" manual. She had on high heel sandals and a mini skirt.....I dunno maybe she was really a prostitute trying to get downtown for free....But heels at the fair? Ok so for all of you out there in blog land that don't know what to wear to the fair I have prepared this quick easy to follow guide.
Now I would like to preface this post by saying not ALL boyz are stupid, and behave badly...Or I will never hear the end of it from Charlie.
I admit it. I have road rage. I have a problem with drivers that are inconsiderate, and/or stupid. The sad thing is, I don't even live in an area where there is a lot of traffic like L. A. Or something. I live in a nice, easy going area where everyone is nice to each other until one of two things happens.
So The Lube Bear went over nicely at work this morning. They were all excited about the prospect of Free Lube, even if in Jen B.'s profesional opinion it's crap. In fact one of the crew actually gave me a new little saying for "Lube Bear".
When last we left Cute guy he had recently derailed his train. NO not figuratively. He REALLY did derail which put him away from town for several days. When he called me again he was down in Long Beach running a train down there. Well sometime between the time he ran that train to Long Beach and Sunday he got two new tattoos. I'm not overly excited by men with tattoos like Jen B. Is. I am more into the nerdy, clean cut, type, but he has such great teeth! The thought of CG with MORE tattoos verges on horrifying me. I mean it's his body he can go from head to toe if he really wants, and hey that's kewl and all, but why wake me up to tell me about it? Does this man ever sleep? When he called me today at work (he lost my work number again and ended up calling my cell---grrr) he had to ask me yet again "You don't like tattoos?"
Yesterday I did not end up skewered by the bosses son. When J. Boss got there, he argued with J Boss Jr. For a good 15 minutes on why he could bring the stick-turned-spear home. Something about the LAST time he did that his sister had to go to the hospital. Even though J.Boss Jr. Did tell J. Boss that was his favorite stick it was left sitting on MY DESK to be disposed of. Random thought: WHO the hell has a favorite stick?!
So...I get past the first part of the day, thinking ok only ONE moronic shipper. Not bad. I am just about to run down and get myself something to eat when J. Boss arrives with his 11 year old son in tow. He says to me. I hope you don't mind if J boss Jr. hangs out here while I go to my appointment? I just looked at him in disbelief. I'm not overly fond of this child. He is a complete spaz. The first time J. Boss did this too me the little monster sat in the office making paper airplanes to throw directly at me. All the while exclaiming "OH Did you see that? I almost hit you right in the eye!" I would just glare from behind my computer monitor, trying to avoid being impaled by one of the little monster's deadly air raids. The time before that he cut up tiny pieces of paper and made confetti out of it, leaving me to pick up the paper for the next 2 days. Today he has found himself a broom handle in the dumpster out back. He has fashioned it into a spear of some sort with packing tape and a ball point pen. Now, after the airplane incident I am starting to think this isn't a good idea, but I ignore him and continue on with my dailey tasks. He then informs me that the radio station I am listening to is horrible. I looked him in the eye and asked him "Did I ask for your opinion?" He backed off that for now, but I can hear him mumbling something about loving Metallica, and wanting to be able to listen to what he wants. It's now 2:00pm. I STILL haven't eaten anything yet, because if I get something I will have to get something for him, and J. Boss isn't so timely with his reimbursements. After all J. Boss JR. Just ate half a candy jar of Hershey Kisses, that I just filled up for the week. I don't get paid enough to Babysit!!!!!!
Mondays are always very busy for me. By noon I am ready to rip parts of my hair out, and/or commit homicide on the shippers that move with us, or my crew. I usually get to work a little bit earlier than my crew so I can get things done before they come in and start asking randomly dumb questions about today's impending job. Mind you, said job has been on the calendar for no less than three weeks. Today even though I got here at 7:00 am, one of my crew was already here. Pinball had gotten here early, got a weight on the truck and was on his way back to the office when I arrived. I almost peed myself with delight, but I was able to control myself. It's a good thing too because my case of "Urine Be Gone" hasn't arrived yet!
It's been a while since I have talked about Cute Guy, so I thought I would post a brief update. I did talk to him last Friday night. I was out at the bar singing karaoke with Jen B. when my cell rang. Of course who else would be calling me at 10:30 on a Friday night, but CG. I talked to him briefly only to find out he was working. He had driven yet another train down to Long Beach and wouldn't be home until maybe Sunday. I had friends inside so I made the convo brief. I asked him if he wanted me to call him when I got home and he said he would be in bed. I was still planning on calling him to REPAY him for all those nights when he woke me up to tell me he was bored. I never got the chance. On the way home he called me again! I was not the least bit amused to find out the reason he was calling is because he was watching "TR*Y again, and felt it was uber important to tell me all about it. I thankfully lost service in the mountains and didn't have to hear anymore of that. When I got home I tried to call him but he didn't answer, so I can only assume he went to bed.
I didn't post yesterday because I wanted to make sure I got this right. You see I have a confession to make. I have had a deep dark secret for the last 3 years now.
It happened...He called. So for those of you who bet he could only hold out on torturing me for one day, your prize is in the mail! YAY!
About 6 years ago I was living in a place I hated. I had just ended yet another bad relationship, and I was pretty much miserable. I didn't want to go out to sing yet for fear of running into the ex but I was a Diva with a NEED to sing. A friend had told me about this nifty little place on line called MPlayer. I said what the heck and signed up. I started going into these really weird little chat rooms and singing with other people over a computer Mic. Not exactly what I was used to, but it got me my fix.
I feel like I would letting you down if I didn't post an update on "cute guy". Last night he did call when he got into town. OK, so I was asleep, snoring, enjoy the puddle of drool I had made on my pillow, but the fact remains he DID call. Riddle me this... WHY DID HE CALL? It was like all the conversations before. He told be about getting home, taking off his work boots, and turning on his TV. At least he didn't inform me of his boredom issues. Although right about that time I could have informed him of mine. He then questioned me about my blog, since he decided to read it...Out loud...To all of his train friends. (insert confused look here) Random Thought: Do you think they think he is funny? Then, in reference to my blog said "I don't get it" Well duh "cute guy"! That's obvious that you don't get it, because if you did I wouldn't be ranting about you now would I? I sighed and said nevermind it's futile, a moot point, just nevermind. Then he was babbling about something, and it quite possibly could have been something rather important, but I am not really sure what he was talking about. You see I asked what he was watching and he said the movie "Troy".
Since today is Jenne's Birthday (yes ok so I know a lot of Jen's) and she claims to be blogworthy this post shall remain all about her.
Now normally this would make me wanna wet myself with glee, but I know that he is just trying to torment me, and he starts of the conversation with "I'm Bored!" Hello!? McFly? NO woman wants to hear the reason you called her is because you are BORED! Try something a little more flattering like oh I dunno...I actually like talking to you? You have great boobs! (By the way I do) or how about cause I think you are nifty? Anything but bored.
Thursday nights are always spent the same way every week. NO, I do not mean watching that completely retarded television show "Friends". ...
Karaoke of course! My friend Jen B. and, her sister Angie (aka lesbiana-she is not gay, well she might be, but that is another topic completely) used to always go to this bar called Harry's Nightclub. They invited me one night and the rest is history. It's not really a nightclub though. It's more like a beach bar with a few regulars and a lot of snotty people who go there to get drunk and hook up with one another. I don't fall into either of these categories though. I belong to a cult. It's not a bad cult really. We don’t harm anyone, unless of course you consider blatantly making fun of the bad singers "harmful". It's not even really a cult. We don't dress alike, we don't shave our heads, and we don't worship any kind of alien life form, or date Katie Holmes. We just sing. To Jen and me it's more than just going out, having a good time and just singing though. It's a show, a performance, and it's all about fame.
It all starts with me trying to get out of work early so I have more time to shop and get ready. If I achieve this task, I then hit a local retail store for yet another purse or fabulous accessory that I could not have before today, lived without. From there I go home and try on everything in my closet knowing full well that I am going to end up wearing the first outfit I tried on. A little bit of paint, and hair product and I am ready to go. The ride down to Harry's is usually filled with Jen texting Craig over and over about something his cat did, while I chatter on and on about something that the crew did. The scales of the accomplishments are just about equal. When we arrive, there is the usual greeting of the host, and possibly his girlfriend who will gush about our shoes. We sit in the same spot each week. It's a well planned out spot. It's close to where you stand to sing, yet not too close to the speakers. It easily accessible for men, yet secluded enough we don't actually have to make eye contact with anyone if we so choose. We agonize over what we will sing first, because if it's too good than we have peaked too early, but if it's bad people will automatically think you suck. The night pretty much continues on that same course unless something magical happens, like one or both of us trying a new song and it really sounding great on the first run through. (This has happened only twice in my lifetime) Now for some reason even, though Jen & I are scantly clad, and the best singers in the room, men rarely approach us. I have a theory that they either think we are lesbians, or they are intimidated by our talents. I am hoping it is the later of the two choices. We have a lot of male friends, but sadly, they are not what we would call "dateable".
Let's just explore why these men fall into the non-dateable area, shall we?
Randy: Aka "Wrestler Randy" Randy is a perfectly nice man, and would move Heaven and Earth for me. However, he is short (we have previously talked about my aversion to midgets), dresses badly, has bad hair, has bad teeth, and sings funny. I left out the most important part. One day Jen & "lesbiana" saw Randy jogging down the road. That's great that he cares about his health and wants to get out and enjoy the sunshine and all, but did he have to dress in one of those little wrestling "onesies"? You know the one piece, spandex jumpsuit slash short set type thing that men on wrestling teams wear? If only I had been able to see that for myself.
Tim: Aka "Baby Powder" Tim is sexy for a short guy (see above), but I think he only dates skinny women with large eyes, that can't dance. He wears this cologne that smells like baby powder, which lingers on everything for days afterwards.
Because tomorrow...I will feel like crap.
Jen and I will probably wrap up the night by singing something fabulous. People will comment on how amazing we are, and ask us why we aren't on American Idol. We will have to pretend to be flattered and shocked that people want to hear us sing, and go home knowing that for one brief shining moment we were great.
I signed up for eHarmony yesterday. I know it's completely silly, and way overpriced, but I had a "special promo code" in my e-mail that got me 3 months for the price of one. How can anyone pass that up? Well ok, so I thought I would try something new. I signed up, took all their endless personality tests, and posted the best pictures I could find of me. I spose I should have posted the "pork-n-beans" picture, but I was at work when I was setting this all up. (insert innocent look here)
What does the fourth o July mean to you? To me it's a chance to celebrate the fact that I am still a free American with the chance to do anything I want with my life. I think as a woman I should feel extra blessed, as women in other countries don't have those same freedoms. I believe most young women today actually take that for granted. If we all could just look at today as more than just "another day off work"...(unless of course you work in an adult novelty store and don't get the day off) and actually be thankful for what we have, perhaps this world could be a little better even if for just one day.